Self-Worth, Ministry, and Misery-1

Most people get their self-worth from their vocations and this is no less true for those in Christian ministry. Most Christians in ministry—whether apologetics or other Christian ministry—want to become renowned, or at least more well-known, more respected than they are. We see other renowned ministers and we wish we could have the renown they have and we strive to get it because we base our self-worth on our ministry success. Many of us Christians realize that we will never be Tim Keller, William Lane Craig, or [fill in the blank of your favorite minister or apologist] _____________, but we are trying to get as close to famous as we possibly can.

Obviously this temptation is greater for full-time ministers but this temptation also occurs when people vie to be the most respected Sunday school teacher in their church, or the best worship leader, etc.

Some of us in ministry may never have consciously realized that this is what we are doing. All we know is that we lust to be more renowned, more respected. The majority of Christians in public ministry struggle with this because it is so easy to base self-worth on ministry success. And this is disastrously destructive to disciples of Jesus.

The reason this is destructive to discipleship is that basing our self-worth on ministry success fosters selfish ambition, jealousy, and every kind of lust. As we read in James 3:16: “For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” We should not be surprised, then, that so many famous and not so famous ministers supernova in a sex scandal. Lust is lust.

In the last couple of years I’ve had some candid conversations with famous apologists about self-worth and ministry and they’ve confessed that they struggle not to base their self-worth on their ministry success.

I’ve certainly struggled with it! Thankfully, however, this has diminished  over the years (but not disappeared—I’m working on that!) as I’ve internalized several Scriptural truths.

My Self-Worth Story

I became a Christian in 1969 and by 1970 I was devouring the New Testament (I didn’t get to the OT for quite some time). By 1972 I was the 16-year-old co-leader of a high school ministry on my campus that met for several years. We had about 65 high school students meeting in my parents’ house every Saturday night. The head ministry honcho was 19 and I was second in charge. I taught Bible studies to those students, and (I know this is bizarre, but it was during the Jesus movement) many of them called me “pastor.” Frankly, mentioning this is embarrassing.

This early success fed a lust for human acclamation but I really did also want to please the Lord.

Soon I set my ministry goal of being the pastor of a mega, mega-church. It was going to work like this: I was going to become the youth minister at a mega-church, then I was going to be the associate pastor of a mega-church, then I was going to be the senior pastor of a mega-church, and then I was going to be the senior pastor of an even bigger mega-church. Those were conscious thoughts. I had those thoughts all the time. I repeated them like a mantra; they ran through my head regularly (by the way, I never desired being on TV).

Well, as soon as I graduated from college I started my M.Div. and I became a high school youth minister in a church with about 10,000 in regular attendance.


I was on my way! God’s man of power in the hour!

Sadly, however, the Christian education director didn’t see in me the glory that was there. The CE director was holding me back from the recognition I deserved! He liked another youth guy better!

Although my position was secure, I became jealous over the lack of recognition and boy was I working at making it big. Let me say again that I really did want to please the Lord in spite of this worldly lust.

One day the college pastor passed me as he was walking up the stairs to the church office and pronounced, “You’re just trying to build your own little kingdom!”

I could have said a lot of things. I could have replied that he got me wrong, that I just wanted to please the Lord (that would have been a lie). I could have said that I knew I had those lusts in my heart but that was something I was working on (that wasn’t exactly true either).

So, being very, very spiritual, I shot back: “So are you!”

I’d like to claim that at least I was being honest but I’m not sure he was trying to build his own little kingdom! I paid little attention to him, after all, as I was totally focused on my ministry.

Soon my jealously turned into bitterness and then I got tired. Very tired.

Continued tomorrow.

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Why Did God Let That Child Die?

Perhaps the most difficult and emotionally charged question ever asked the pastor or apologist is why God let a particular child suffer or die. The question is rarely abstract. I’ve never been asked why God lets children die. I’m asked why God let six-year-old Ethan get killed by a car while he was skateboarding or why God let four-year-old Kaylee die of leukemia. The typical Christian answer is, “We won’t know until we get to heaven.” Of course, we will certainly know more when we get to heaven, but is that all we can answer? I suggest we know more than that. We may not know all of God’s reasons for letting a particular child die at a particular moment, but we can answer why God allows children to die.

Note that this article isn’t directed toward those who have just lost a child. My wife, Jean, and I experienced five miscarriages, which led to our never having children and we know firsthand what it is like to have Christians try to “solve” grief.1  Those who grieve rarely search for explanations of how God works in the universe. Instead, they need hugs and maybe meals. The Scripture tells us to “weep with those who weep” (Rom. 12:15). But there comes a time, when the initial anguish subsides, that people seek the larger picture of what God is doing in the universe.


Children suffer and die due to three main causes. First, children suffer and die due to pestilence and disease enabled when the Lord cursed the ground after Adam and Eve sinned. He banished Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden, thus barring humans from the rejuvenating power of the Tree of Life. God warned Adam and Eve that if they ate from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, “you will surely die” (Gen. 2:17), and He didn’t add “at a ripe old age of natural causes.” He just said, “You will surely die,” and we’ve been attending funerals ever since. Second, children also suffer and die because of the mistakes and sins of others, such as leaving a pool gate unsecured, drunk driving, murder, and so on. Third, children suffer and die because natural laws work in regular ways: the gravity that keeps us on planet Earth also enables fatal falls; the fire that warms also burns; the water in which we swim can also drown.

Disease, sins, and consistent natural laws, then, are the main reasons that children die. That brings us to the question, why doesn’t God afford children special protection?

Keep reading my article in the Christian Research Journal.

  1. Jean has written about her experience: Jean E. Jones, “The Journey of Childlessness,” Today’s Christian Woman, April 2010, available at articles/2010/april/journeychildlessness.html. []
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Misunderstanding the Canaanite Hyperbole Argument

One thing every professor knows firsthand is that too many of students either don’t read the assigned material at all (shocking!) or, if they do “read” it, they don’t read it carefully. Instead these students think they know enough about the book or article to discuss it intelligently (or not!). As I’ve said in previous posts, I really like Paul Copan and Matthew Flannagan’s, Did God Really Command Genocide?, and I’ve learned much from it, but I’ve also found that a lot of people have misunderstood exactly how far they take the warfare hyperbole argument. It’s my experience that some Christians either haven’t read their book carefully, or they haven’t read their book at all, but they’ve heard their book uses the words “Canaanite” and “hyperbole” in the same sentence, and so assume they can waive away the killing of Canaanite non-combatants as hyperbolic.

That’s mistaken.

Copan and Flannagan rightly do agree that Scripture reveals that sometimes God has commanded the killing of noncombatants. Pay close attention to these words: “Hence, even if God does not command us with these texts to kill innocent people, and even if the texts don’t envision genocide, they still seem to suggest that a loving and just God did command killing the innocent on a particular occasion. This would mean that God on at least one occasion endorsed violations of the principle of noncombatant immunity.”[1] A “noncombatant” would largely mean women and children (and perhaps the elderly), right? So, in other words, they agree that it has occurred that God has ordered the killing of women and children. As I said, I find that for some not-so-careful readers that this will come as a surprise.

Copan and Flannagan continue,

William Lane Craig similarly concedes that “it was first and foremost a command to drive the tribes out of the land and to occupy it. Only those who remained behind were to be utterly exterminated.” So even if we accept that God did not command the extermination of all the Canaanites, and even if we grant the types of warfare involved, then it still seems to involve the killing of the innocent in the sense of killing non-combatants. Even if the phrases “they completely destroyed everyone in it” and “left no survivors” are obviously hyperbole, where does that leave us? How many women and children is it acceptable to slaughter before it becomes morally problematic? Raymond Bradley rejoins, “Does this make God any less guilty? What sort of perverted morality would lead one to conclude: ‘not all of them? Oh! I suppose that’s OK then’?”[2]

So, again, Copan and Flannagan do not argue that God never ordered the killing of innocents. They approvingly quote William Lane Craig who writes that “In very unusual circumstances in the past, God commanded people to kill the innocent for the sake of some greater good.”[3] I completely agree!

Elsewhere Copan and Flannagan summarize where they are going in their book, “Then in chapters 15-17, we will defend the thesis that in very unusual circumstances, God commanded people to kill the innocent for the sake of some greater good.”[4] And finally: “We can conclude then that one can coherently and defensibly attribute to God commands to kill innocent human beings under certain conditions.”[5] I completely agree.

Now, all this being said, why are we so concerned about the killing of Canaanite non-combatants anyway? After all, if the evidence I’ve adduced in previous posts is correct, then this wasn’t the traditional human war over land or treasure. Instead, God’s commands to kill the Canaanites that remained were about capital punishment. Sure, God gave the Canaanites ample opportunity to flee (as Copan and Flannagan rightly emphasize) but in God’s considered opinion, those of the age of accountability who refused to flee were in no sense innocent and that certainly includes all the females. Yes, the killing of children is a different issue but I’ve dealt with that previously.

Romans 6:23: “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”


[1] Paul Copan and Matthew Flannagan, Did God Really Command Genocide?: Coming to Terms with the Justice of God (Grand Rapids: Baker, 2014), 142-143. Emphasis theirs.

[2] Ibid., 143.

[3] Ibid., 145.

[4] Ibid., 146.

[5] Ibid., 207.

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Canaanite Hyperbole Interpretation Inconsistent

In my last post I suggested that appealing to hyperbole doesn’t offset the charge of divine genocide as there are two other Biblical events where God did kill every man, woman, and childNoah’s flood and the destruction of the Canaanite cities of Sodom and Gomorrah. In this post I want to examine what I think is a serious problem with the Canaanite hyperbole interpretation: Scripture reveals that God meted out precisely and literally the punishment He said he would inflict on Israel when Israel committed the same Canaanite sins. I call this the non-parallel problem.

The Not-Parallel Problem

One of the biggest problems with calling the command to destroy everything that breaths among the Canaanites “warfare hyperbole” is that God threatened Israel with similar destruction and we know those threats weren’t hyperbole. God told Israel that if they let the Canaanites live among them that they would soon commit the sins of the Canaanites, and when they did, He said, “I will do to you what I plan to do to them” (Number 33:56).[1] Thus my argument is that if God did exactly, literally what He said He would do to the Israelites—that is, if He wasn’t using hyperbole—then it is inconsistent to claim that God used hyperbole to describe what He said He wanted done to the Canaanites.

So let’s look at what God threatened would happen to Israel if they committed the sins of the Canaanites and lost His protection.


In Deuteronomy 28:30, the Lord warned that in disobedient Israel, a man “will be pledged to be married to a woman, but another will take her and rape her.” Lamentations 5:11 tells what happened when the Babylonians seized Jerusalem: “Women are raped in Zion, young women in the towns of Judah.”[2] No hyperbole there. Continue reading

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Hyperbole Interpretation Not Helpful for Canaanite Conquest

Arguably the most difficult story in the Old Testament is the killing of the Canaanites. Some have attempted to soften this hard story by saying that certain passages are hyperbole. Perhaps the most prolific purveyors of this theory are Paul Copan and Matthew Flanagan in their book, Did God Really Command Genocide?: Coming to Terms with the Justice of God.[1] In that work, Copan and Flannagan write that some of the more difficult passages should not be read in a “straightforward, literal way.”[2] Instead, the “commands to ‘utterly destroy’ and ‘leave nothing alive that breathes,’” are “hyperbolic (using exaggerated language).”[3] Now, I greatly respect Paul Copan and Matthew Flannagan, I consider them friends, and I find their work extremely helpful. In fact, I employed their arguments in my last post. But, I see problems with the hyperbole interpretation.

First, the biggest problem with the hyperbole interpretation is that I don’t think Scripture allows for it. Rather, the unforced reading of the text is that God did intend that Israel should kill every man, woman, and child who didn’t flee the land that God had given Israel. I’ll talk more about that in a future post.

Second, I don’t think the hyperbole interpretation accomplishes much because we are still left with two other examples of God killing every man, woman, and child in a particular Continue reading

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How Could It Be Fair to Kill Canaanite Children?

In a prior post we saw that the Canaanite childhood was full of terror and loathing. How could it not be when some friends and siblings were burnt to death in the arms of the bull-headed god Molech, family members raped them, and animals were brought into the house for sexual entertainment? Then in my last post on the Canaanites we saw why Israel could not adopt these children without the Israelites, themselves, becoming corrupted

In this post we answer the last question specifically regarding Canaanite children: how could it in any sense be fair for God to order their deaths? There are several things to say about this.

First, it is not always wrong to kill those innocent of wrongdoing. Of course that seems counterintuitive but Paul Copan and Matthew Flannagan in their book, Did God Really Command Genocide?, provide a timely illustration: Continue reading

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Sci Fi, Free Will, and the Problem of Evil

In teaching every semester on why God allows evil, I’ve learned that many Christians do not understand the nature or value of free will. Indeed, many years ago I too struggled with what free will is all about, but found an unlikely ally in science fiction. Sci-fi books, movies, and television programs frequently feature free will as a major theme and thus help illumine this abstract topic.

free willSince many more people see science fiction on big and small screens than read sci-fi books, I will use only examples from movies and television where these themes are staples of the sci-fi genre. Most of these shows did very well at the box office or in TV ratings, and were very well received by critics; many also spawned popular video games.

Movies and television shows develop this subject partially because free-will science fiction resonates with themes much larger than most people imagine: Continue reading

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Christians Should Be More Accepting?

So many tell us that Christians should be more accepting of homosexuality. Yesterday, in fact, I listened to Andrew Wilson debate Rob Bell on the UK Unbelievable? radio program about homosexuality and the church. Bell was asked to explain the justification for his beliefs that there is nothing wrong with committed homosexual relationships, and, among other things, he said, “This is sort of the bullshit that really, really, really, pushes people away, is when you have a particular conviction and all of a sudden your orthodoxy or your faithfulness to Jesus is all of a sudden called into question…. This is why so many people don’t want to be a part of the church.”

Indeed, I’ve heard that a lot lately. Something to the effect of, “Christians should be more accepting! If you were, more people would join the church. Instead, you’re driving people away.” Continue reading

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Why Couldn’t Israel Adopt Canaanite Children?

As I pointed out in a previous post, when God freed the Israelites from Egyptian slavery, He told them to drive the Canaanites out of a portion of land promised to Abraham’s descendants. The Israelites’ coming was preceded by miracles such as the Red Sea and Jordan River parting, so the Canaanites knew there was something supernatural behind their advance. Some chose to flee; some chose to fight.

And, as I’ve argued in another post, we don’t have any reason to believe that even one of the Canaanite adults that died in the fighting wasn’t guilty of great wickedness; that was, after all, the reason God gave for driving them out of the land. But what about their children, some of whom died?

In ancient wars where parents died, soldiers faced three alternatives for the children: (1) take their lives; (2) leave them to starve and be eaten by animals in the desert; or (3) adopt them. Obviously leaving them to starve or be eaten would be a worse fate than a quick death by the sword. So let’s look at why Israel couldn’t adopt Canaanite children. Continue reading

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The Horror of Canaanite Children’s “Family” Life

Although this post neither addresses the Lord’s motive for taking the life of the Canaanite children nor the fairness of it, before we get into those things, we need to understand the context. This, too, is sad to read, but we must not imagine Canaanite children as being in any kind of a normal home by Western standards, or even most Ancient Near Eastern family standards. Canaanite childhood wasn’t a fun Brady Bunch or Modern Family existence: it was horrific.

Life was hard on Canaanite children because, among other things, the Canaanites committed two types of sins which damaged their children. Continue reading

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